What A Difference A Year Makes

This week we celebrated Hannah's first Christmas!  We had a wonderful time with family and good friends.  Thursday was a party at the neighbor's house (thank you Amy, for a wonderful time!), Friday was celebrating with my mom's side of the family, then the candlelight service at Headwaters (which Hannie sat through without making so much as a peep...a REAL Christmas miracle), Saturday morning was of course SANTA TIME, and then we celebrated with our friends the Fenings, and then again with the neighbors Saturday night. I am exhausted just writing about it!  Hannie loved her gifts, we didn't go overboard with presents, but she LOVED her tent, her table and chairs, her drums, and her doll stroller.  

I was actually surprised she loved the stroller as much as she did. Hannie is not, despite my best efforts, a girly-girl in any way, shape, or form.  The dolls I have given her look brand new because she rarely plays with them.  She much prefers playing in the dirt with her boy cousins than playing inside with the girls.  Most of the time, I watch her wrestling or playing ball with Bubba and my dreams of tea parties, paper dolls, and ballet lessons slowly fade.  BUT every once in a while, she surprises me, and when I see her pushing her baby doll stroller through the house, hope springs anew!

We are headed to Disney this Spring (before Kazapalooza) and I would love to hear from any families who have taken very young children there recently. We have been a million times, but never with an under 2 traveling companion.  I am wondering how it will be trying to keep 2 adults, one baby, and one 7 year old happy in the Happiest Place on Earth.  I think we may skip Hollywood Studios. I LOVE it, but there doesn't seem to be enough there that Hannie would like. We may have to get a hopper pass though, because I hate to miss Fantasmic.  We are planning to do the Chef Mickey's character breakfast, and possibly more character meals.  Planning for Disney is the equivalent of strategic military operation!  The jury is still out on a hotel.  We have stayed in almost every park property, and The Beach Club is far and away my favorite, but I think we may stay at the Polynesian this time so I don't have to deal with a stroller on the buses.  The last trip we stayed at Wilderness Lodge, which was nice, but I think the kids would prefer the pool at the Polynesian.

 In just a few days, we are coming upon the ONE YEAR anniversary of the day I got THE CALL.  I guess if you chose to have your babies the regular way, you never forget the moment you find out you are pregnant, or maybe the moment you hear the heartbeat or see the little tadpole (well that's what they look like to me anyway) on the ultrasound.  Maybe I will someday experience that as well, but I can't imagine it being half as exciting.  In the world of adoption, you never, ever forget the moment you get THE CALL.  Except, that I honestly don't remember that much about it!  I know it was January 12, 2010, about 4:30 in the afternoon; I was just about done working.  I remember Anne calling and excitedly asking what I was doing.  I told her I was about to run to the mall to get a gift for my Dad's birthday; maybe a picture frame or some cigars. I think she said something to the effect of, "You'd better get PINK ONES because IT'S A GIRL!!!  She is 6 months old! I just emailed you pictures!" And then I don't remember anything after that.  I am sure we talked about IA doctors, travel plans, and paperwork, but I have no recollection of any of it.  It was as though my whole life I had been living in a black and white world, and then all the sudden, for the first time, I was seeing everything in color.  I raced to the computer and saw her beautiful little face for the first time. Isn't it odd how our lives can change in an instant.  One minute I am playing Candyland and working on basic concepts with my little patient Salah, and the next, I am a MOM!!!  

During the adoption process, you are always waiting for the proverbial other shoe to drop. I held my breath for 12 months as other countries closed to singles, changed age restrictions, and went on indefinite adoption hold status.  But seeing her little face made it all real.  I read the first line of the email Please refer this little girl to Herman.  Since this blog is now public, I won't share the rest of the email, but these pics were attached.  I got in the car to go home and turned on the radio.  This is no joke.  The first song that came on was Savage Garden, I knew I loved you before I met you.  I called 3 people on my way home. First was my mom, who predictably hysterical.  Next was my best friend Elizabeth (Hannie's namesake), who was just getting over the passing of her Grandmother but wasn't going to let a little thing like death keep her from going to Kaz. She immediately rushed over to the house to join in the excitement.  The third person I called was my cousin/sister Jaime, who was more excited than anyone else.  I literally though my eardrum was going to burst from all her screaming.  Since I had mostly toddler boy stuff, Elizabeth and I headed straight to her sister's house. Cath has 4 kids and a whole shed filled with baby gear. We loaded up the car and raced home. The next 2 weeks were a flurry of packing, paperwork and travel prep but I will never, ever forget that very special, very memorable day.  

I did end up getting my Dad a picture frame for his birthday, with a picture of his first Granddaughter inside.  I just went to the the store and bought him another picture frame, and inside I put a picture of  my baby who is no longer really a baby. She is now a walking, talking wild and crazy toddler.  What a difference a year makes!

"Do not be afraid, for I am with you; I will bring you children from the east and gather you from the west."  Isaiah 43:2-5         

Merry Christmas from us and Little Miracles!!

Hannie is on the the Little Miracles Christmas card!!!

http://myemail.constantcontact.com/Merry-Christmas-.html?soid=1010974979992&aid=rc7KuywHMtA

Happy Holidays and Merry Christmas
from Little Miracles International

However your family celebrates, LMI is wishing you blessings and happiness at this most wonderful time, and prosperity in the New Year. Thank you for entrusting our agency with your adoptions and donations. We look forward to many happy events in our relationship in the coming year. 

I promised myself that I wouldn't do this but it is absolutely precious so I just had to.   For the winner of the all time Bad Santa Photo Award....Erin Herman with her lovely and terrified Kazakh beauty, Hannah...and the baddest Santa of all...SCUBA SANTA!!!

Hannah Herman meets Bad Bad Scuba Santa!!!

Maggie and Rachel Scott, never too old for Good Good Nice Santa!!!

It seems like yesterday my husband and I were embarking on that journey in December in 1998, during the worst blizzard in Romania in 40 years, to pick up Maggie, and then again 4 years later I boarded a plane to Romania again on the very same date in December to adopt Rachel.   They are now 16 and 18 years old.  Time moves so quickly yet when you are adopting it doesn't seem like it moves at all.

Cherish each moment, before and after your adoptions.   They are moments you will never experience again.

All the best to you and your family from the Scott family and Little Miracles International.

May God richly bless you!

Lori Scott, Executive Director
Little Miracles International

Bad Mommy Award Winner!

I used to have a lot of theories about raising a child.  Now I have a child, and no theories.  This week I did one of those things I never thought I would do.  I would like to preface by saying that I enjoy going out to dinner.  To say that Hannie does NOT enjoy it is a little bit of an understatement.  I try to keep her entertained with crayons, books, crackers, toys, etc. But she just doesn't tolerate being strapped in a high chair for more than 20 minutes, and most of the time one of us ends up wolfing down our food and walking her around outside until the rest of us are finished eating.  So I gave in.  I pushed my thoughts of mommy guilt to the back of my mind, plunked down (WAY TOO MUCH) money and purchased the Fisher-Price Kid Tough Portable DVD player, designed to stand up to even the most wild and crazy toddler.  And guess what? IT WORKS!!!

For all the haters, I should mention that we don't watch TV at home, and so I don't feel TOO bad about letting her watch a semi-educational video every few days when we hit the restaurants.  And I am guessing the other diners don't mind not having to listen to a howling, unhappy toddler either.  So that's my confession, please don't judge! I am going to include at the end of this post a video of Hannie identifying body parts to make up for the movie-watchin' :-)

December continues to fly by with the holidays just around the corner and the weather poised to turn treacherous any day now, we are trying to pack in as many fun activities as we can.  Here are some  recent pics of holiday fun, including a holiday party, sledding in the snow, seeing Scuba Santa at the Aquarium, and fun at EnterTRAINment Junction with Hannie's Kaz friend Kamilla!

 

In my profession, when patients can't remember the past, we call them "poor historians."  The same could be said for me these days.  Since I never did get around to getting Hannie a baby book (again, Bad Mama Award), I use this blog to keep track of my Best Girl's milestones.  WARNING BRAG ALERT!!!  Boy is she doing great!  She is identifying and sorting (and labeling!) shapes and colors, demonstrating comprehension of pronouns and some opposites, knows over 20 body parts, can take off (and even sometimes put on) her clothes, throws balls, and her fine motors skills are wonderful.  She draws lines and has a great pincer (sp?) grasp.  I have stopped counting words and phrases because she has so many, and she has also started to sing a bit (her favorite -- e-i-e-i-o).  She also gets SO excited to be in the company of other kids.  My mom takes her to several playgroups throughout the week, which is great for her social skills.  Gross motor-wise, she is still behind, however, she is now regularly taking around 7 steps independently.  She kind of lurches around and looks like Frankenstein when she walks, it's pretty funny, I will have to video it.  I purchased literally hundreds of dollars in assistive equipment for her -- walking wings, braces, Suresteps, etc.  In the end it was a 50 cent bag of candy that did the trick.  It is AMAZING what this child will do for a single blue M&M.   She still needs to work on motor skills though, but Help Me Grow won't classify her as physically delayed until 18mos, so next month she may qualify for some more services. We shall see.  The only other issue we are having is behavioral in nature.  Hannie has recently become more aggressive when playing with her peers. After several unsuccessful attempts to discourage the behavior, I have begun following the Alderian approach to behavior management.  Basically, I am teaching her to be respectful by using a logical consequence (aka, a modified time-out).  So effective immediately, the rule in the Herman house is: IF YOU HIT, YOU SIT. I am being consistent and following through and I believe the message is getting across.  Well that is it for this post, Merry Christmas To All and To All a Good Night! 

    

 Biology is the least of what makes someone a Mother ~Unknown

Childbirth is an act of nature, adoption is an act of God ~Unknown 

Chrismukkah, UNICEF, and Museum Fun!

Chrismukkah is a pop-culture neologism referring to the merging of the holidays of Christianity's Christmas and Judaism's Hanukkah as celebrated in interfaith households where one parent may be of Christian heritage and another parent of Jewish heritage.  ~Wikipedia

My mom is Jewish and my dad, Hannie, and I are all Catholic so in our family we celebrate any and all  holidays.  Hannie so far this month has enjoyed blowing out the candles on the menorah (not exactly what is supposed to happen, but that is neither here nor there), watching National Lampoon's Xmas Vacation, reading My Jewish Book of Colors, attending a Santa lunch/sleigh ride, etc.  It's is a mishmash of traditions but it works just fine for us.    

We spent a wonderful day with some Kaz families at the Children's Museum of Indianapolis this month, and WOW that place is unreal!!  We spent all day there and probably didn't see half of it!  Hannie loved the Yule Slide and the Carousel of Dreams, and Mama loved getting to hang with her awesome Kaz friends Muriel, Alaina, Karen and Shauna and all their kids.  Here are some pics from the day...

Because this is first and foremost an adoption blog, I want to share a particularly well-written piece from the Washington Times on UNICEF's effective attack on inter-country adoption.  If you scroll down to the bottom of the article, there is a great debate amongst readers on the accountability of UNICEF.   A representative from UNICEF issues a statement clarifying their position on the adoption process as well.  While I think we are all in agreement that  adoption processes should be carried out in an ethical, transparent and legal manner that is in the best interest of the children and also of adopting families; I cannot support an organization that favors leaving children to languish in orphanages rather than loving homes. This holiday season, if you are considering supporting an organization, I would like to recommend some that hold special meaning to me.

 Two Hearts for Hope  An organization dedicated to helping the orphans in Kazakhstan.
Antares Foundation Another organization dedicated to improving the lives of orphans in Kazakhstan.
Dream of A Child  A non profit run by the founder of my adoption agency (Little Miracles, Intl). I like this organization because it works in a variety of countries and provides a number of very worthwhile sponsorship projects. 100% of the donations go toward  assisting in medical, physical, nutritional and emotional development for children in need.
Interlink A non profit aid organization with a branch in Shymkent (Hannie's birth city).  This organization does a wide variety of aid projects, my favorite of which is a medical clinic that offers a range of special services for children with cerebral palsy, including physical therapy, massage, therapeutic horseback riding and support services for parents.


May your days be Merry and Bright!   ~Erin

Dolce far Niente, The Sweetness of Doing Nothing

The video above was made by my sweet friend, Jim, and will be used in a project I am working on.  Jim is an AP to a beautiful baby boy from Kazakhstan as well.  The Kaz family has once again amazed me with it's generosity of spirit.  As for Hannie and I, we are doing well.  16 mos has been a crash course in parenting 101. As you can see from the pics below, Hannie is now walking ALMOST on her own, and with mobility has come independence.  The baby gates are up, anything breakable and/or dangerous has been moved to a higher shelf or locked in a cabinet.  I find myself saying many things I never thought I would say, such as:

Hannie, stay out of the doggy's cage.

Hannie Elizabeth DO NOT throw the baby Jesus in the toilet! ( perhaps I should clarify, she got a she got a nativity set)

For the love of Pete, Hannie, we don't eat sticks of butter. 

As of late, I have often been pondering  a quote I once heard from my favorite author, Elizabeth Gilbert, who said, 

"There are only two questions that human beings have ever fought over, all through history.
How much do you love me?  And who's in charge?"

And anyone who has ever been in any type of relationship, be it with a significant other or with a child, knows that this is true.

Compared to September and October, our November calendar has been blessedly clear, and Hannah and I are truly enjoying, as the Italians would say, "dolce far niente", which loosely translated, means the sweetness of doing nothing. We do have a few things on the agenda, we are planning a trip to the Festival of Lights with my friend Emily, her little girl Isabella (two weeks younger than Hannah, and her BFF) and our moms, who are also friends. In an attempt to give my daughter "presence, not presents" for the holidays, we also purchased museum center passes (good for the Children's, History, and Science Museums) with 3 other Kaz Families in the area so we are looking forward to spending some time there. As a matter of fact, we went today, and imagine our surprise when we LITERALLY stumbled over a YURT!!!    

  We are also excited to announce that Hannie will get to be a flower girl in a wedding this spring/early summer.  My friend Jenny is getting married and Hannie and I are both  in the wedding.  I know I am biased, but she will just look SO cute dressed as a miniature bride.  I am already having panic attacks about how we will keep the dress and her clean long enough for her to walk down the aisle and smile for pictures. And speaking of pictures....

And I would like to end this blog, with a poem, which I stole from another friend's blog :-)

I didn't give you the gift of life,
But in my heart I know.
The love I feel is deep and real,
As if it had been so.
 

For us to have each other
Is like a dream come true!

No, I didn't give you The gift of life,
Life gave me the gift of you.

Lots of love and light, ~Erin

Celebrate Adoption (cause life is short but sweet for certain....)

It's been a busy month. We went to the turkey festival last weekend, this weekend is the Annual Orient Way neighborhood Thanksgiving, then Sunday we are going to a Kaz Kids meetup and also there is an Adoption Celebration at church.  Oh, and in between those things, Saturday morning Hannah will be a "grand marshal" in Hamilton's annual Santa Claus parade (perks of having a godfather who also happens to be the mayor).  Then Thursday is the actual turkey day, which in our family entails eating all day and watching National Lampoons Xmas Vacation.  Then its family game night and some shopping on Black Friday!  Whew, I am tired and the fun hasn't even started yet!   As you can see from the pictures above, Hannah did not enjoy meeting the big man in red.  Not enjoyed may be an understatement.  She howeled like she was on fire the entire time we were there.  She did recover enough to enjoy a nice Christmas cookie and look at the fish (we were at Bass Pro).  Also, some random tidbits from this month...

***I recently asked Hannie what she wanted for Christmas this year.  She stared at me for a minute and then dug through my purse and handed me my car keys. Apparently, she would like her own car.  This child is ALL THINGS FABULOUS!!***

***Her new favorite books are called Everyone Poops, The Gas We Pass, and  Walter the Farting Dog.  Is this normal?! I am not so sure.***

***The KAZmaniac took her first of I am sure many trips to the ER this month.  I was not home, Mom was watching her and she set her on the kitchen counter to wipe her face.  Hannie spied the cookie jar, lunged for it, and took a nose dive onto the hard wood kitchen floor.  She's fine, except for a black and blue knot on her forehead.  Good thing the social worker's post placement visit was LAST month, LOL.***
 

Celebrating Adoption  is a photographers' organization dedicated to providing beautiful portraits celebrating a family's new adoption.  Recently, one of the photographers came to the house and snapped a few shots of Hannie. Here is a sneak peek of the photos.

The only other interesting thing going on right now is that I am involved with a VERY cool adoption project with my wonderful agency.  It's not public knowledge yet, but it will be soon and I can't wait to share it with all of you (and NO...I am NOT adopting again yet!)  Happy Thanksgiving to all my friends, and in the words of Hannah, GOBBLE GOBBLE MAMA!!! XOXO ~Erin